Milking the Romanticism

As you become more conscious in a relationship, you can no longer milk it for its romanticism, because it is more interesting than that. It really is, but people keep wanting to romanticize their lives all the time. It’s part of the culture. However, the awakening process starts to show you the emptiness of that form and you start to go for something deeper.

Truth of Romanticism

You start to go to meet another human being in truth

Truth is scary. Truth has bad breath at times. Truth is boring. Truth, you know, burns the food. Truth is… all the stuff. Truth has anger, it has all of it.

But, you stay in it and you keep working with it and keep opening to it and keep deepening it.

Relationships Require Opening

And every time you trade in a relationship, you begin to see how you keep coming to the same places. And how you tend to stop. Because it gets too heavy when our identity gets threatened too much. For the relationship to move to the next level of truth requires an opening and a vulnerability that you’re not quite ready to make.

So, you pull back and start to judge and push away, and then you move to the next person, where you have the rush of the openness and the same thing starts to happen.
All the while you keep saying, “Where am I gonna find the one where this doesn’t happen?”

Living the Truth in Yourself

…it’ll only happen when it doesn’t happen in you – when you start to take and watch the stuff, when you start to get quiet enough inside yourself that you can take that process as it’s happening and start to work with it – continuing to come back to living the truth in yourself with the other person, even though it’s scary and hard. You hear what I’m talking about?


-Ram Dass